Ordinarily...
Dec. 15th, 2009 10:47 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
askygoneonfire...when I have thoughts like these I wait until they form a coherent whole and I then post the considered, occasionally articulate, contemplation. Tonight, however, I just want to get it out.
Right now I am fearful of an unspecified *something* that looms at the back of my mind. It seems to whisper that my anticipation of what next week will bring is misplaced. That the unformed hopes I have will never achieve a clear shape. It will be unconsummated optimism.
And the fear, the dark cloud whispers, is not of a tangible thing but it is instinctive and well placed. You know what you fear and you should. Because tinsel and champagne will never eradicate the cause. Nothing you await with baited breath ever has or ever will.
You see now why I don't post this? I understand my expression perfectly, it is as solid and exhaustively descriptive as it is possible to be about the solid reality of the emotion which doesn't let me sleep.
Right now I am fearful of an unspecified *something* that looms at the back of my mind. It seems to whisper that my anticipation of what next week will bring is misplaced. That the unformed hopes I have will never achieve a clear shape. It will be unconsummated optimism.
And the fear, the dark cloud whispers, is not of a tangible thing but it is instinctive and well placed. You know what you fear and you should. Because tinsel and champagne will never eradicate the cause. Nothing you await with baited breath ever has or ever will.
You see now why I don't post this? I understand my expression perfectly, it is as solid and exhaustively descriptive as it is possible to be about the solid reality of the emotion which doesn't let me sleep.
(no subject)
Date: 2009-12-15 11:04 pm (UTC)Unrelated: last night I had a couple of friends over. One of them noticed the sketchbook you made me, and she thinks it's the coolest thing ever. ;)